We survived day 1

And actually, more than survived, my little kindergartner flourished, as she normally does.

I don't know why I worry the way I do.

All the way up to the night before, putting Ali to bed she kept saying over, and over that she didn't want to get on the bus by herself and wanted me to come with her.

This was her Friday during dinner after having had a wonderful open house at the school, meeting her teachers, some new friends and practicing how to get from the bus drop off to her room.

But. I. Don't. Want. To. Ride. The. Bus.

It was a tough weekend leading up to her first day Monday and I really thought it was going to be a scene. Instead I got this:

Ready to go!

We see the bus!

And the only one who cried was Lizzy when the bus pulled away and she realized Ali was still on it.

Alice left me!

After school, Ali about floated off the bus so excited to tell me all about it, and then this morning was just as excited to go back.

Bus Stop Day 2

My grown up little girl.

Complete panic is not far off

My little baby girl starts kindergarten in five days.

FIVE DAYS!!!

I am not ready for her to be old enough to put on a bus.

She's already started to work up to a pretty significant anxiety level when the other day she looked at me and asked "Are you getting on the bus with me??" And I had to say 'no'. Mommies aren't allowed.

Since that question she has come up with all kinds of scenarios for how it would be possible for me to ride the bus with her. She's really thought it out.

I expect this to be a pretty tough bus pick up on Monday morning, for both of us.

And, I've already had to start being the crazy over protective mother. I got the bus stop assignment and am not happy with it. We live on a very steep hill, with no side walks, around a very blind corner, on a road that has a posted speed limit of 25 mph but most cars do more like 45-50 mph around that corner and down that hill. Checking our mailbox can be a life or death sort of adventure. And they want my baby girl to walk up that steep hill, around the blind corner which leads to another hill over which cars come flying with no visibility to go 5 houses up to the 'bus stop' at another little girls house.

No.

Thankfully it was a very nice man that I spoke with this morning at the Transportation Department who did not make me feel like a crazy mom and who is going to go check the walk from our house to the stop to see my concerns and see what recommendations he can make for moving her pickup/drop off stop.

Other than the bus stop issue, I think we are fully prepared. I have a huge crate of the requested school supplies. A new backpack, lunchbox and My Little Pony dress for her first day. She will also be getting a special little snugly surprise that will be hidden in her backpack to help bribe her on to the bus where she can then see what her surprise is. Bribery, every parent's fall back!

The open house is Friday. We have a play date scheduled Saturday evening with some other kindergartners in our neighborhood and then will spend Sunday afternoon making plans for the coming week. Outfits laid out. Breakfasts and lunches planned. With Alice making her own decisions which (in theory) will lead to a smoother morning since she knows exactly what is going to happen each day. We'll see about that.

Wish us luck!

Three weeks of summer

This is the first year that Summer has an official 'over' date to it. It's a little weird. And is making me a little panicky. I've started worrying about summer things we haven't done yet.

We haven't gone to the zoo, all year and we have a membership that we got as a Christmas present.

We've only been to the park once.

We haven't been to the spray ground which only costs $1 per kid and is literally two minutes away from the house.

We haven't been to the library, ever, since it opened...two years ago and it is the same two minutes away from the house.

We haven't been to the butterfly exhibit at the Nature Center that is 10 minutes from my house where they send the kids into an enclosure with a sugar wand and a massive collection of butterflies swarm you! What?!?!! How did I only learn about this last week??

And, have you seen the back to school supply list for kindergartners?? Or any age actually. It's crazy!

Three little weeks.

Someday

Someday you will be in your local book store shopping for your niece's first birthday.

Someday you will see a beautiful display of children's books with an endearing title and sweet cover drawing.

Someday you will flip through the first half this beautifully displayed book without reading it all the way through and buy two copies, one for your niece and one for you to read to your children.

Someday you will snuggle into bed with your two little ones and your husband and read this beautiful endearing book to your precious children, still without having read the whole thing yourself.

Someday you will reach a page that says "Some day you will read something so sad you fold up and cry."

Someday you will not read that page without tears rolling down your own face and your husband looking at you like you're completely insane.

Someday that beautiful, endearing book will continue to get sadder and sadder the further into the book you get.

Your two year old will wipe the tears from your eyes as you continue to read, certain it must get better.

You're husband will continue to look at you like you're out of your mind for purchasing and then reading this amazingly sad book.

And then, Someday, when you finally reach the end and you have to explain to your four year old why it is you're crying. You will then get to reassure and calm your hysterical four year old that you will not be kicking them out of the house to make it on their own tomorrow or anytime soon and then end up promising her that she never has to leave you, ever.

Someday I will learn to read a children's book all the way through before attempting to read it to my children.

I do not recommend the children's book 'Someday', regardless of the beautiful display, endearing cover, or sweet beginning.

(I did thankfully read it before mailing the copy to my niece. I sent a Barnes and Noble Gift Card instead.)

I lost my wedding band

It hurts. It actually hurts to look at my hand and only see one ring instead of two.

I can't believe I lost it. That it's gone. It's so unreal.

How could I have lost something that is such a part of my finger? It's attached. It's a piece of me. It's gone. How could I have been so careless?

I took Cleary out for a walk on Tuesday and half way down the hill from our house realized I hadn't taken my rings off. I don't like wearing my rings when I'm out running or walking in the heat. My fingers swell and it's uncomfortable. I usually leave them in a box in my kitchen. Tuesday I forgot to take them off before leaving the house and with Cleary there's no turning around. Not an option, he'd put the brakes on and it would be a fight all the way back up to the house.

So, I took off my rings and stuck them in my arm band that holds my phone, just tucked them in behind my phone and off we went.

We got down to the lake, went only part way around and then started heading back when my phone rang.

I pulled it out of the arm band and answered it.

Not even given half a thought to what was in with my phone.

I got back to the house and only had my engagement band.

Of course I immediately ran back down there (without the dog) and checked everywhere I had walked, but didn't find it.

I then had to pick up the girls and after I had stuffed dinner in them, rather literally, I dragged them back down to the lake and the three of us walked the path again and still didn't find anything.

I called my husband and he stopped at the lake on the way home and he checked too.

No ring.

We've put up flyers, posted the loss on the neighborhood facebook page, emailed the community director in case someone contacted her about finding a ring.

No ring.

I don't know what to do. I don't know that I want a new band. I want my old band.

The one I got married in. That my husband put on my finger.

The one I took off my finger and lost.

Hello Summer - Good bye Preschool

I definitely fell off the blog bandwagon for a while. The month of May seems to have disappeared. Memorial Day has come and gone and summer is definitely here, officially or not, 92 degree days and afternoon thunderstorms says summer to me.

I haven't been writing because I haven't had much to say I guess.

Things are good. Normal. Quiet.

I hit my weight goals and have comfortably maintained them.

The girls are good. Lizzy is still two, so there's that level of challenge but on most days she's still a pretty reasonable little girl.

Ali 'graduated' from preschool and will be heading to kindergarten in August.

*shudder*

That wierds me out in such a major way. She'll be riding the bus. To school. With kids. Big kids. Mean kids. Nice kids. All kids. I'm not sure I'm ready for this. I'm not sure she's ready for this. She can't tie her shoes. Shouldn't a kindergartner know how to do that? Am I failing as a parent because she doesn't?

I've been teaching her to open her own applesauce without making a mess, so I can send applesauce to school with her. How to open granola bar wrappers, because I've always done it. I worry she won't be able to open a Tupperware container with her lunch in it.

Am I completely ridiculous to be stressing about this.

Yes.

Probably.

Will I stop.

No.

Probably not.

I'm having actual nightmares about putting her on the bus and having her sob so hard the other kids make fun of her.

In short. I think I have officially turned into my mother. And my grandfather. Expert worriers about absolutely everything they have no control over.

Excuse me, I need to go have a panic attack.

Cleary

Well, I knew it wasn't going to last long, but even I was surprised at how quickly we found a new dog to be part of our family. I didn't think my husband would be that interested but I think it's been strange and hard for all of us to not have a dog in the house.

So, meet Cleary!

He is awesome!

He is a 5 year old boxer mix who was with a rescue group here in GA. He'd been there for over a year and apparently dogs who are older than 2 or 3 have a harder time getting adopted. Everyone wants a younger dog. I have to admit when I started the search I was looking for 2 or 3 year old dogs and so he didn't come up on my radar. We went to an adoption event to meet one particular dog who ended up not being there. But Cleary was! He climbed into my husbands lap, washed his face, and we were sold.

He is so good it's amazing. I can't image who wouldn't have wanted this dog. He is so loving and so sweet. Loves everyone he meets and really thinks he's a lap dog.

It's definitely strange to have a dog in the house that isn't Murphy and while it's nice there's definitely a level of guilt and relief involved. Relief that I can invite my neighbors to the house without having to worry about Murphy biting someone. Guilt that I am relieved he's no longer with us.

But, at the end of they day, when I'm snuggled into my chair with Cleary tucked in with me, I know it was the right decision for everyone and he's going to be a great family member. We just have to work on his running skills. He tends to want to chase squirrels.

Love car rides. Hops right up and knows his seat is in the back.

Loves coming to work with me and after playing for a bit, takes a little nap.

Really wants to be a lap dog.

Cleary selfie!