Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Joey had it right...

Does anyone remember the episode of Friends where Joey puts the book in the freezer because it was scary.

I had to look it up to remember it was the Shining, but, yeah, 'joey book in freezer', you can google that!

I can relate to that so much and I don't know why it's taken me so long to make that connection and while I don't necessarily put the book in the freezer (I listen to audio books on my phone and I think that might do a little damage should I put my phone in there) I do stop listening for a little while when things get tense. I have to work up to it before I can go back and continue reading.

Right now I'm in the middle of book four of the Outlander series which I absolutely adore! The whole thing is just fantastic! It's a good story and good story telling.

In my head I know it's silly of me to get so worried about the situation since I know there are a bazillion of these books in the series...

(notice I didn't say 'since I know it's only a book')...

so, clearly it will be ok in the end...

(It's never 'only a book'.)

but I do get terribly stressed out about some of the situations these characters find themselves in.

(I think only a reader will understand that.)

(I don't know why I'm having side conversations in my own blog post).

So right now my book is "in the freezer" i.e. phone in purse, until I can work up to turning it back on and finding out what happens and if everything is ok or if I have to be upset about something.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Sweet moments

My girls are getting so big it's hard to believe.

They are both very busy girls and Elle especially rarely ever sits. If I sit on the floor, she'll sit in my lap and play, but not snuggle.

Ali does love to snuggle now that she's a little older, but at Elle's age was the same way.

Busy, busy girls.

Elle's been a little cranky the last few days, either teething or growing, one of which seems to be perpetually in process, and Sunday she was definitely out of sorts after church. It wasn't time for a nap but she was just not a content girl.

So I went and got her blanket out of her bed, and snuggled with her into a rocking chair in the living room where Ali was watching something on tv.

Elle snuggled right in with me and didn't really sleep, but was comfortably drowsy and sweet.

Ali saw us and came over too, crawling up on the other side of the chair and sitting on the edge where I could rub her back and play with her long hair.

Both my girls, snuggled in with me on a Sunday afternoon.

It was so sweet I didn't want it to end.

Monday, May 11, 2015

Happy Mother's Day

I have so many great stories from this weekend that I don't know where to start.

First, the Friday lunch play date with Max's mom was wonderful. I'm so glad we were able to plan that. Ali didn't really remember her and there were no questions or awkward statements from her. The babies had so much fun and everyone was worn out after playing on the playground for a couple hours.

On Saturday morning we went with some friends to a Strawberry Festival and had a BLAST!! Ali loved it and Elle ate so many strawberries I'm surprised she wasn't sick. It was a beautiful day and with all the activity and craziness the girls were so well behaved.

The true highlight though was that Anna and Elsa from Frozen were there. Ali and our little friend Audrey were like teenagers at a Justin Beiber concert. It was so funny I was in tears, I was laughing so hard. The girls were screeching in excitement, but then Ali completely froze up (no pun intended) when it was time to actually meet them. She did hug Anna but then basically stood like this the whole rest of the time.

Completely overwhelmed. Probably a good thing we're not planning a (very expensive) trip to Disney World anytime soon. I think she needs a little more time.

After that we ran around and played in the bounce houses and then went back to the car to cool off and have a snack.

Then Ali had a defining educational moment, one every girl must learn at some point.

How to pee behind a tree...

Yep, we had to park so far our from the strawberry farm and there were no port-a-potties anywhere near us, plus having the two girls on my own at this point (our friends had left just a few minutes earlier) meant that it just wasn't going to happen. So, we had our first lesson on how to answer the call of nature while you're in nature. Thankfully the parking area we were in was next to a little wooded area and there were a few discreet options. She thought it was hysterical. Thankfully I also keep a change of little girl panties in the car, as they were needed, although for her first time she did really well.

Both girls crashed on the drive home and our actual afternoon nap time got a little off schedule, but it was worth it to have had such a fun time.

Speaking of little girl panties...because that's a normal topic of conversation...

Ali is officially 100% potty trained at night. Last week she requested to wear panties to bed instead of a pull up and hasn't looked back since. Saturday morning was a full week of staying dry all night and so I told her she could have anything she wanted for breakfast since she had done such a good job and was such a big girl.

So...we had ice cream sandwiches for breakfast...not quite what I had in mind, but I didn't clarify my offer at all, so we just went with it. Ice cream for breakfast.

Mother's Day was nice. Quiet day at home. I made a quick dessert for some of the strawberries, although I didn't use nearly as many as I had hoped.

Puff pastry, vanilla pudding, cool whip and sliced strawberries. Really good!

I also got the sweetest presents from the girls that they made at daycare.

I also got a massage gift certificate from my husband which I am very, very excited to use. Although I have no idea when that will be since I have to work next weekend and then it's Memorial Day Weekend and we usually got to TN. Oh well, it will not go to waste, trust me on that!

All in all it was a very fun weekend. Very busy but full of fun outside times and lots of friends and family.

I hope all the mothers out there had a wonderful day too.

Thursday, May 7, 2015


I have a fashionista. Which is a problem. Because I want to buy her cute little outfits that I think are adorable.

And then she won't wear them.

Do you see this completely adorable outfit?

My sister in law got her that for Easter and I had to fight tooth and nail to get her to wear it to church last week. It is so stinking cute and she got so many compliments during church. She couldn't get out of it fast enough once we were home. I was lucky to get the picture. Notice I did NOT get a smile.

Last week I got some fun things at Old Navy, one of my most favorite places to shop for the girls. Well priced, cute and durable and if they destroy it (which Elle does all the stinking time!) it's not that big a loss.

This dress was a clear winner and Ali immediately put it on, thrilled for the pink lacy tutu.

However I was super excited about this little shirt and leggings set I picked out.

Yeah, she took one look at the top and announced "I don't like it."


It's not fair. I should have had at least two or three more years before we hit this phase. Right??

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

The problem with reading memoirs

I am nearing the end of a wonderful book that I have thoroughly enjoyed by Billy Crystal. It's called Still Foolin' Em and is basically his life story with so many wonderful details about all the movies, shows and moments that have made up his career.

The problem is, it's so well done, and so well written I feel like I'm one of the many 'smart, kind and caring' friends (a phrase he uses a lot) that have actually participated in this amazing life and career. The personal level of detail he shares is stunning.

Some of it is funny, some of it is sad, some of it I agree with and some of it I don't. Apparently Billy has a problem with pit bulls, so that's on my radar now and can never be unsaid.

But his passion for baseball is palpable and I was literally watching the Braves game last night like it was something new and different, all from listening to someone profess their love of  the game.

His love of his family and especially his wife is genuine and endearing and so lacking in the general Hollywood crowd that it's refreshing.

Not that I would ever have a run in with Mr Crystal, but if I did, I have this fear that I'd call out like we were old friends and say something like 'so how's the batting cage, still out hitting?' Or 'how's those grand babies?' As if I knew them.

If you're looking for a fun, easy read, it's extremely worthwhile.

Monday, May 4, 2015

Lunch Anxiety

This Friday I am having a lunch/play date with Max's mom. She has an older daughter, 8 or so, and her baby who is just a few months older than Elle. She's bringing her kids and I'm bringing mine.

I am excited to see her and spend time with her, but I am super anxious about it too.

I have seen her several times since Max died, and I've brought Elle with me before, but not Ali.

Ali has not seen Max's mom since the day of the accident at Mama T's.

This has partly been due to a lack of opportunity. But partly because I was afraid that Ali would tell her about that day.

I know she has young nieces and nephews that are about Ali's age (Max's age) and that she has probably had to field questions from them about where he is and what happened. But Ali saw it happen. She has told me about it and some of the things she told me at the time were upsetting. She didn't know what she saw or what it meant, but she knew that it upset me and that was really hard for both of us.

I did tell Max's mom that Ali saw the accident and most of what she said to me about it. Not all. It actually changed some things about that day that were assumed and I felt she needed to know. But some of it I knew would be hurtful to hear and so I kept those pieces to myself.

I'm afraid she's going to see Max's mom and have that reminder, that link back to that day and some of those memories, which haven't surfaced for quite some time, will come back.

She does still remember and every once in a while she'll tell me a boy got stuck at Mama T's house. But she doesn't really remember Max all that clearly. She couldn't tell me his name but could tell me that he got stuck and that I was sad. For her that was the biggest trauma of the day, my reactions. Hindsight being what it is, I wish I kept myself together a little more when I was in front of Ali, but you can't know how you'll react to such a situation.

All this worry may be for nothing, but I know I"m going to have this roll in my belly all week as I think about the things that Ali told me of that day, and what she may say to Max's mom.