Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Another, Another Million Dollar Idea

Yes, food related. I don't know why I have so many fantasies of operating restaurants.

I want to have a two story restaurant. The downstairs section is a fairly regular restaurant, very jazz like, intimate settings and an eclectic menu. What would be different is the upstairs level.

The upstairs level would be the equivalent of dinner and a show. I envision it being set up very 1920's-1930's lounge style, round tables, high back booths and tiered seating all facing a stage. Have you ever seen The Thin Man movies? I love those! That's the atmosphere I had in mind.

The upstairs is Reservation only and is a flat fee for the whole night. Essentially, you buy your table, it's yours for the whole evening and includes dinner and drinks from a set menu which changes weekly. The menu would be something extravagant  like a 12 course tasters menu. So, for some amount of money per person or so (ok, I haven't actually figured out the pricing on all of it) you get dinner, drinks and a show and can hang out from 7 or 8 until 11 or 12 (again details i haven't worked out yet). Maybe there's a dance floor too, I don't know.

I just thought it would be a cool change from a regular restaurant and make it more of an experience. You would place your drink orders but basically as soon as you sat, your food just starts arriving and keeps coming out the whole time.

It's probably something that's already been done and I just don't run in the right circles to know about it. I'm sure the celebrity scene in LA is all over it. Well, suburban Georgia apparently doesn't cater to the same crowd. :)

Oh well. I still like the idea.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Thankful Post #12 - Patience

This week I am thankful for patience and the opportunities to practice it.

Yes, a little tongue in check this week, but it's all I can muster at the moment.

Still pretty stressed. High anxiety. I think our installers are working about 4 hours a day at our house and laying about 10 pieces of tile per day. And our guest bath is still gutted.

We have no bathroom for my in laws coming on Friday, but we have patience. Lots and lots of patience because that's all we can have right now.

But I am thankful. I am thankful that we are able to afford to replace our floors and update the guest bathroom. I am thankful my parents are able to keep the dogs for three weeks in a row. I am thankful for the knowledge that once this is over, we will have beautiful floors.

Mostly I am thankful for the patience to endure.

Friday, March 22, 2013

No one has ever died over tile, until now.

It should be said, that I work for a tile company. We import and distribute tile. I've been on many ends of this company and have frequently used the phrase 'no one has ever died over tile, and today is not going to be that day' when I'm in situations with customers and coworkers who are upset about something.

Well, we may have actually reached that day. My husband and I are redoing the floors in our house, which I have mentioned, and I am honestly not sure that he, I and our installer are all going to make it out of this alive.


The initial estimate of 4-5 days to tile the downstairs is now on day 10.

Now, to be fair, we found some extensive water damage and subfloor issues that had to be repaired and it added an additional 4 days or so to the whole project. Now, I know you're doing the math and that 5 days plus 4 day is a total of 9 and so we're only one day over that projection, right?

Well, here's the issue, the installer has been laying tile for four days, and we're only half way done. Even if there were no delays, no additional work, no extenuating circumstances and we were going solely on his initial estimate of a 4-5 day project. He has been laying tile for 4 days, and has only covered half the floor.

Again, to be fair, it's 745 square feet of tile. That's a lot of tile. He has two workers with him though. It's not him there by himself, that I'm aware of anyway.

My husband is about to blow a gasket. I feel like I am going to throw up, and cry. There used to be an 'or' in that sentence, it's now an 'and'. Throw up, and cry. No 'or'.

I have reached such a level of anxiety over this. The thing is, I can handle the stress of a delayed project. I can handle the inconvenience of having my house torn up for two, going on three weeks straight with my in laws scheduled to visit over Easter. And, I can handle my husband's short temper and perfectionism mixed with the need to see the negative in everything. However, I can not handle all of that at the same time.

So, again, I am fairly certain that me, the installer, and my husband are not going to all make it out alive.

I am going to my mother's this afternoon with Baby A to visit family that is in town. This visit has been planned for a while. I may just be staying at mom's house for the foreseeable future. I can't imagine that the tile will be finished before next weekend, when my in-laws arrive and I don't know what to do.

And, the best part, is not even the floors. That's only step one in this project we're doing. The upstairs guest bathroom is completely gutted. There's a tub, but the shower fixtures have been dismantled in expectation of tile. The floors are completely bare. There is no toilet. We did get the new counter top delivered and installed yesterday and it looks beautiful! It's the only thing that has gone right so far. I have no idea if we'll have a functional bathroom for my in laws when they get here. That, is the part that really has my husband in a tizzy. This whole project, upstairs and down, should have been done already based on the original plan. We're not half way done with just the downstairs.

Now, I need to go find the Tums.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Thankful Post 11 - Great Neighbors

This week I am thankful that we have some really great neighbors. We live in an older section of our subdivision and most of the people around us are retired, or close to it. Sometimes I do wish we lived in an area with more children Baby A's age, but there are definitely benefits to having built in Grandma's all the way around the house! We've had one of our neighbors across the street come over during a car emergency and stay at the house for 20 minutes or so while Baby A was sleeping so my husband and I could get the car over to the shop before it closed. Another neighbor has invited us over many times to visit so Baby A is familiar with her and has offered to baby sit a dozen times or more.

And of course our wonderful friends Uncle W & Miss A and their daughter Little A (fondly called Chubs). Our daughters are 7 months apart (and the same size!) and we couldn't be more thankful that they're so close in age, and that they just live up the hill from us. We're looking forward to this summer with our girls at the park and the zoo and all the fun things Atlanta has to offer that they're old enough to enjoy this year.

We call them and they call us for all kinds of help. W recently had his car die on the side of the road. My husband helped him get the rental and get home. In the past W has helped so many times with so many things in our house I can't even begin to relate them all. He's even helped my mom while she was house/dog sitting for us and she got a hanger stuck down a drain while trying to clean it. First he took a picture just for good measure. :)

We love having W&A for close neighbors and truly appreciate everyone around us and know that if we were even in a bind we would have plenty of help on hand.

Monday, March 18, 2013

Stir Crazy...or just crazy.

I'm supposed to do one of my Thankful Posts today and I'll get to that, maybe tomorrow. Today I am crawling out of my skin and I', really not sure why. It's like giving someone a pot of caffeinated coffee if they've only ever had decaf, except I love my caffeine, it's not that, it just feels like that. Almost a literal itch but inside.

It's been a rough couple of days with Baby A.  I don't know if she's teething or what, but everything is a fuss.  Everything. This morning I let her sleep way, way longer than normal, almost a full hour past when she's normally up, and she was still so 'off'. I don't know if that's part of my anxiety today.

My dogs are back at my parents house so our floors can be finished. Hopefully we'll have everything done by early next week. I"m crossing my fingers for Saturday, but I don't think that's overly realistic. It's also assuming they don't find anything (else) wrong that needs to be fixed before moving forward. At this point, that's a HUGE assumption.

I miss my dogs. My house is a MESS. I spent the whole weekend cleaning dust and debris from every surface including the furniture. I'm so excited to have new floors, and have a new guest bathroom, but holy crap is the process making me nuts.

Add to my normal level of persistent mom anxiety the fact that on Wednesday I have an appointment for a Lasik consultation. That scares the sh*t out of me. Really. Really really.

But, we've had to take a break from our attempts at having another baby because it was starting to get too stressful for me and I was afraid if I did get pregnant now, it would be a stressful pregnancy with too many due dates. We had set money aside in a flex-spending account thinking we would be having a baby this year. The flex-spending money is only available during the 2013 calendar year and if it isn't used, it's gone. Really, I thought I'd be pregnant again by now and hadn't worried about it at all but now we're quickly approaching the last few weeks that it is possible to get pregnant and have a baby in 2013 and suddenly it felt like we were trying to have a baby just so we don't lose money...which wasn't sitting very well with me and was stressing me out. I was also afraid that come Dec 31st I was going to be 8.99 months pregnant and doing jumping jacks in the kitchen trying to explain to my unborn child why they needed to come out now.

So, instead, we're taking a break from baby making and instead, I'm getting Lasik. Or, that's the plan anyway. I am beyond nervous about this. I'd say I'm half a step away from sheer panic.

That's probably what's got me so worked up. At home I wasn't thinking about it too much, but here at work, it's a big, fat appointment on my calendar that I look at 1,000 times a day. Every time I think about Wednesday my stomach churns just a little more.

What if they mess up? These are my eyes. They're the only ones I have. It's completely terrifying.

So, I'm sitting at my desk practically levitating. It's hard to concentrate. I'm not motivated to do anything but am surrounded by things that need to get done.

It will all be ok. Right?

Friday, March 15, 2013

You may be right, but your volume is wrong

Another Love & Respect Post.

As soon as these words were said, pretty early in the book, I knew they applied to my husband and I. Only in our arguments the word 'volume' needs to be replaced with 'tone'.

It doesn't matter how right you are, if the tone of your voice (or volume) is disrespectful, you're not winning the argument and only creating a bigger problem.

I have a terrible habit of making snide remarks. It's something that my husband pointed out to me early in our marriage and I have made significant efforts to curb myself. I really think I've done well and rarely does anything actually escape anymore. I have to be pretty pissed off to slip up and say something nasty. I may be thinking it, but really, I don't let it come out anymore.

My husband has a 'tone'. It is frequently used with the phrase 'I wish you wouldn't have...' fill in the blank. I find this tone very condescending and whenever it is used it truly feels like my husband thinks I"m a moron. Complete and total idiot who shouldn't be allowed out on her own. I know that is not what my husband thinks of me. I know that is not how he thinks he sounds, but that is how it is heard by me. His father uses the same 'tone' with his mother. And his brother uses it with his wife. It has been well taught by the men in this household.

Whenever that tone comes out it makes me want to continue arguing whether or not I'm right or wrong. It doesn't matter if my husband has a valid point, I'll argue against it just because that tone sets me on edge.

This is something I have tried to explain to him before. That tone. He doesn't hear it. He doesn't know when it's coming out. Now, I have a response that I can use; that will not promote continuous argument.

'You may be right, but your tone is wrong'.

Just knowing I have that resource makes me feel better. Having a response to my husband when we argue that isn't going to be hurtful, disrespectful, or argumentative.

We both need to work on our tone when we disagree with each other. I am excited for him to read/listen to this book so he can have these tools also.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

My Big M Problem

My poor puppy. He has such issues.I don't even know where to start putting him back together. I don't know where or when he fell apart. He is so scared and defensive with men.

We can't have contractors in our house with Big M there. The Chinese Delivery Guy is terrified of our house. The mail carrier hates stopping at our house to drop a package. Big M lunges at the UPS delivery trucks that drive by while we're out on walks.

He's actually getting better with his reactions to other dogs, every once in a while has a relapse, but with strange men, he is so unpredictable.

Today I had to bring both Big M and Old Lady to the office because we're having our floors repaired/remodeled and we can't have Big M eating the contractors. Old Lady just tends to be under their feet, literally, and while the guys don't mind her, she doesn't need to be a pest while they're working. My mother was coming to get them but before she got here, Big M tried eating one of my good friends at work, RP Jr. It just hurts my heart that he is so scared and that I can't trust him. No one got bit, this time, but the whole reason Big M is going to my mom's is because this contractor who is in the house is the one Big M bit last year.

I am so lost with this. I never thought I would have an out of control dog and have always thought people with such crazy dogs don't know what they're doing. Old Lady is fantastic, she's my girl, she's turning into a grumpy Old Lady, but for a boxer at 11 years old with arthritis, that's not overly surprising.

Right now we're mid flooring project with the entire downstairs torn up and discovered not only rotten subflooring but the subflooring used is not what is needed for the tile we intend to put down. It won't hold. So instead of just plopping tile down and being done by Friday, we have to have the entire thing torn up and redone. Add $2000. Add massive amounts of stress and an additional 3-4 days.

Between Big M, the floors, my husbands stress at work, our stress over trying to have another baby, my blood pressure has to be through the roof. I pretty much want to just dive into a couple bottles of wine and not come up for air.

"First World Problems" Right? I know. I need to shut up.

Thankful. Remember. I'm being Thankful this year.


Monday, March 11, 2013

Thankful Post #10 - SPRING!!!!

Spring has come to Georgia! I am thankful for sunshine and warm, dry weather!

We had a fabulous weekend and I am looking forward to spring and summer with Baby A. We had so much fun. We walked around the lake and she chased the geese. We went to the park and took a long walk, ending up on the playground where she loves the swings. We played on the deck with the new water table I got her a few weeks ago. It was just so much fun to be outside with her and enjoy her fascination with all these new things! This is the first time she's been old enough to really get outside and play and have fun. I am so thankful for this time with her and I hope I can always look at her enthusiasm with matching enthusiasm.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

You are responsible for your response.

So I've been listening to this audio book 'Love and Respect' by Emerson Eggerichs and I have to say I'm highly impressed. There have been a few things that I kind of make a face about as I'm listening to the author explain his theory but overall it is overwhelmingly a positive read and thought provoking experience.

There are many things in this book that I would like to talk about, but this one really sticks to my heart. 'You are responsible for you response'. It doesn't matter what is said, by whom or how, you are responsible for how your respond to that and in the end you, and you alone, are answerable for your response  The excuse of 'well, they said/did something [fill in the blank...bad, mean, wrong, hurtful, embarrassing, etc] and I just reacted' doesn't fly. It doesn't matter what 'they' do or so. What matters is what you do or say and that is the only thing you have control over.

It is a bible based theory but it's not preachy and is really just good common sense in so many ways that it doesn't need to be attached to bible versus in order to be well explained and thoughtful. This was one of those things. The religious references are that God has instructed to love others as you love Him and that if it were easy to love everyone, he wouldn't have to say so. You are not rewarded for loving those who are easy to love and who love you back. You are rewarded for loving those who maybe don't deserve or didn't earn your love, but you gave it anyway. You are responsible for your own response, to all things and in choosing to love in spite of faults and failures, in spite of tension and bitterness, in spite of being unlovable and just plain difficult.

For some reason that one really hit home. I'll be posting more from this book, there's a lot of really, really good stuff in here and even if your marriage is great, it's still helpful and insightful. I think reading things like this occasionally keeps you from taking your spouse/partner for granted, which is what I was concerned about and I think had started to happen.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Love or Respect?

I find this question hard to answer, so I'm sharing for you to ponder also.

In terms of your partner's feelings toward you, if you had rate either Love or Respect as the more important aspect of your relationship, which would you choose? Realizing they are not mutually exclusive and most relationships will have some measure of both, which is higher on your list for how your partner views you; with love, or with respect?

Sunday, March 3, 2013

Thankful Post #9 - Faith

I feel like a bad Christian that it took me until week 9 to be thankful for my faith. I guess my excuse is that each week, during the week, something has happened or inspired me to choose the topic for my Thankful Post and it took this long before it jumped at me.

This week I am thankful that I have faith. I am using this as a broad term though. I do mean faith in God. I also mean faith in myself, in life, in my family, in my direction. I think it takes a lot of personal strength to be able to stand back and truly believe that everything will work out the way it is supposed to. It takes strength of character and the ability to be honest with yourself to fully know that you are in Gods hands and that through all the obstacles, choices, mistakes, lessons, wins and losses, he is not going to drop you.

It's not always easy and there will always be those obstacles, choices, mistakes, lessons, and losses, but I know it will all be ok in the end. We will come out of each experience stronger and wiser and more appreciative for the things we have, for each other. It is faith that allows us to keep putting one foot in front of the other each day.